How long has it been?
What happens when girls who have known each other through wayward children, job changes, ludicrous mistakes, relocations, and almost born grand-babies come together around brunch as an excuse just to laugh in the presence of love, eggs, Jesus, and lipstick?
We mend our souls and conquer the world.
There are people in my life that I like seeing separately but love seeing together, and me, Melody, Robin and Suzanne make a loony unit. Between us we have 8 kids, 2 1/2 daughters-in-law, too many pounds we’ve lost and we’ve found, and innumerable hours of talking, yelling, and weeping with God. The one thing we never manage to be together is speechless.
Because of this we have unimpeachable credibility with each other. They’ve earned the right to call me on my crap, but usually a look will do.
How do we get so run ragged that we wake up believing we have no time for this? This thing that meds and mimosas can’t replicate. What is it about seeing old friends that feels like a long drink after miles of mirages that promised to quench?
I just wish I knew what causes the thirst that makes us so parched between visits.
Excuses we use to let time pass between friends:
- Our routine is established and changing it takes an extra effort.
- New decisions or changed situations have us on different paths.
- Being crazy-busy, stressed and out straight.
- We have no idea why we stopped getting together, and we’re worried about it.
- Life is hard and we stopped calling everyone.
- It’s been so long that we feel really horrible so we’re bathing in horribleness, and can’t get unstuck.
I’ve taken a few of those for a spin.
Ask me what it was like to spend 3 hours last month with a high school friend I had not seen in decades. You know what I’m going to say. It was as if no time had passed. Neither of us really knew why we’d let something as insignificant as four states and a few Great Lakes separate us, but the truth is, we had.
It’s such a common human experience, it’s cliche’d, but the minute I saw her standing in her doorway, the years were no issue and we were ourselves. She still lives in my heart and she never had left.
Now that I’ve had sweet time with old friends, every excuse I had made for staying away from people I know will receive me as me, love me, and add value to my world, seems brittle at best.
Today with my girls, we made up for lost time. We all agreed as we gathered our dishes and reached for our hugs, that the occasion called for a “groupie” (thank you, Neil, that one’s going to stick), so we snapped about 12 and laughed till we cried. And as we were leaving, everyone said, “When can we do this again?”
But this time we scheduled it before comfort could steal the momentum.
Harry Burns: The fact that you’re not answering leads me to believe you’re either (a) not at home, (b) home but don’t want to talk to me, or (c) home, desperately want to talk to me, but trapped under something heavy. If it’s either (a) or (c), please call me back.
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